Walk for Life!

Today was the Walk for Life. Woo hoo! And guess what? It wasn't cancelled for rain! In fact, it didn't begin raining until after the Walk for Life ended. It was overcast during the walk, but it only started raining when the last people to leave (us) slammed their car door and began to drive away. Neat, right? This year the McPhersons walked away with four door prizes, because there were a ton. I think most people thought it would be cancelled and didn't show up so the door prize to person ratio was all messed up. Anyway, Grace got two pocketknives, Emily got a watch battery, Connor got bread, and I got a box of make-up. Yes, make-up. I traded the entire box for one of Grace's pocketknives. She's a wheeler-dealer, that one. Now she has a knife AND a box of make-up. She made out like a bandit. Oh yeah, don't ask me what Emily is going to do with a watch battery since she doesn't even have a watch let alone a watch that is low on power.

Apocalypse Warning

You know what sucks? Disasters. Tomorrow is the Walk for Life, (ta-da!) but there are several disaster warnings going out in the area. We are purportedly going to get hit by severe thunderstorms, tornados, and zombies. Stay away from windows. Of course, this suggests that there may be some difficulty in walking for life along a pleasant riverpark walkway, since the riverpark walkways will probably not be very pleasant tomorrow. Sigh. We never have natural disasters around here. Why on the day of the Walk for Life?

P.S. Do you know who I do no pity. Dr. Shaw's Taxonomy of Vascular Plants' class has a hike scheduled for tomorrow. It would suck to be in that class during this semester.

More Work than Completely Necessary

Does it ever seem to you that you do more work than is really necessary? Last Tuesday, MyChelle from Choices sent me a message on Facebook asking me if I could find out for her who puts together the Welcome Packages, the packages that are given to all the people who are getting a dorm for the first time. Anyway, I waited until Thursday so I could ask Tyler, the SGA president who took care of those. He advised I see "Val from the Housing Department" with my questions. Anyways, I struck out from the computer lab today towards the "Stacy Town Center" until I realized I had no direction where it was. I got directions from a random handy passer-by and successfully found the Housing Department, down on the crook of University Street and McCallie. Alas! They told me I had to go the Admissions Department because they were the people who put those together.
"OK," I said, "Where is the Admissions Department."
"Uh, hold on," the lady dialed a number, assumably the Admissions Department's, "Hey, where are you guys at?"
Inaudible speaking from the phone.
"They're in the UC, right across from the computer lab. You know where the UC is, right?"

Groooooooooan... I can't believe I had to walk all the way to McCallie and back when all it took was for me to walk across the lobby. Blaaaaaaaaah.

Organization

Ha ha ha. There are so many things in this world to organize! Entropy really is increasing! Trying to contact Megan to ask her if she'll help with the AAA banquet so that Molly (AAA intern) will know how many people are coming has been really tough. I haven't seen Megan face to face since Friday. (Except for a short stint before my Political Science class but I was in such a rush I forgot to mention it.) Also, the UTC people denied my claim to a room for the Vintage Dance Club because no such club exists. Grumble. I'm going to have to fix this. Right now I have so many notes on my arm it is starting to look like I was involved in a very painful typewriter accident.

Plant Army

If all the plants of the world decided to rebel against the establishment and overthrow the animals, the movement would be centered in our yard. We have the meanest and cruelest plants under the heavens, although we keep them for the most part under check.

Like our Morning Glories. Every fall we take them off our mailbox and discover that the plants have yet again snapped the mailbox off of its post. The only reason it stayed up all summer was because the plants were so thick that they were holding it there.

And Dad expressed worries about whether our daisies would survive in their new habitat. Well, I won't be surprised if by Friday those daisies have replaced all living organisms in the area. They multipy like rabbits. Soon, Choices will be manned by daisies. It will be seriously scary.

Next Pro-Life Club Meeting

Alright, so admittedly the club was not an instant-hit-type smashing success story. We had two people show up including myself. Bryan B. and I pretty much only went over what we could do to get more members. Anyways, that doesn't mean that I'm going to take this sitting down. I pledged our help to Choices and I'll be darned if I don't keep my word, even if I have to track down every RA myself and mulch their yard alone and bus tables at the AAA banquet solo. Hopefully, more members will join before a few of these dates.

Anyways, for anyone I've already mentioned this to, the next meeting is on Monday, but not this Monday. It is the next Monday, i.e. 10 days from now. I don't know what room yet, because I haven't booked it yet.

Pro-life club meeting

Alright! The pro-life club meeting is tonight! Yay! I'm the temporary stand-in president until tonight so I was the one who organized it, meaning if we can't get into the Riverbend Room tonight, that would be my fault. We'll probably meet just outside the room or use my elite powers of doing illegal stuff to use some other room that's unlocked and unused. The reason it is on Thursday at 7:00 is to economize my drivers. I get Lexie to take me at 5:00 then she goes to her Classics club, sit around for a few hours, pro-life like crazy, and then go to RUF, whereupon someone will come pick me up, hopefully. Anyways, by doing every club activity on the same night, I don't have to worry about getting people to drive me.

P.S. The best strategy for attending clubs without a driver's license is to take a lab that starts at 4:00. When it finishes, all the ministries and clubs begin so you can stay an extra hour by telling your Mom the wrong endtime for your lab and have fun.

Eugenics

Eugenics is "the study of, or belief in, the possibility of improving the qualities of the human species or a human population by such means as discouraging reproduction by persons having genetic defects or presumed to have inheritable undesirable traits (negative eugenics) or encouraging reproduction by persons presumed to have inheritable desirable traits (positive eugenics)."

Yep, there's the Holocaust in a nutshell. Haeckel, from my previous post, was a eugenicist. Why is the guy even remembered? Besides his hack drawings of embryos, and later human skulls showing the evolution from monkey to human with an African skull being in the middle (The drawings were fake. African skulls actually look like European skulls.) His most famous experiment was his (failed) attempt to interbreed Africans and chimps.

The only reason he even performed his disgusting experiment was because everyone knew that Africans were humans and he (being a douche) wanted to prove otherwise! Everything Haeckel did was not only fraudulent, but only aimed to cheapen human life. This guy sucks. Hard.

Perpetuated Falsehoods III, Haeckel Strikes Back

Alright, here it is. The final in this exciting trilogy.

3) Haeckel's drawings are baloney.

A relatively obscure but well respected eugenicist named Haeckel (whose other major contribution to science was the assertion that Africans were the ladder rung in between humans and animals) drew a series of pictures of embryos of varying species (human, frog, other vertebrates). He said that since they all looked the same, this proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that all vertebrates evolved from one another. As you can see, it is a completely illogical assertion. They all look the same, so what? They're blastulas for crying out loud! They are balls of tissue and balls are all typically round. So what if they look the same?
But wait, it gets better. The drawings were FAKE!!! Human embryos do NOT look like frog embryos! True, they bear slight resemblances including being made of tissue, but their shapes and forms are different. Turns out Haeckel made a woodcut of one embryo and then made several drawings of one woodcut.
Nevertheless, I am still told in Biology class that during the first trimester you can't tell what the embryo is going to grow into. If you are told this immediately interject "Um, that's a lie." I was told this same "tidbit" by three different Biology professors. The fact that I didn't know it was a lie until today makes me sick to my stomach. The fact that it is still being taught in school makes me sicker. Especially since it is often used to devalue human embryo life. OH YOU MISERABLE AND DESPICABLE PEOPLE! YOU SIT ON A THRONE OF LIES!!

Oh the things liberals think

I've just gotten here and I've already learned dozens of depressing things that have happened in the last few days. Here's a few.

1. Acorn is heading the census. I already knew this from my depressing newspaper but I didn't know that you weren't allowed to help in the census if you were law enforcement, intimidation group (makes sense, but when liberals say intimidation group they mean AAA womens' services not Black Panther (see point 2.)), or anti-illegal immigration groups. You see, someone who is against illegal imigration would probably not count the illegal immigrants as registered voters.

2. There is a group called the Black Panther Party that used scare tactics to keep white people from the polls during the last presidential cycle. The charges were just dropped recently which turned the thing into a big affair. As one of Grandad's talk radio people put it, it's not smart politics to prosecute the people who got you elected.

3. Just the other day the first male was elected as prom queen. A gay guy in Los Angelos. Darn.

4. It was actually a good thing that the North won the Civil War. Double darn.

5. I now have over $500,000 dollars in debt to pay for the rest of my life and the number is growing.

6. Did you know that Andrew Lambert was gay? I didn't. I didn't even care who he was. I just knew he was a good singer.

7. A new Supreme Court Justice is on her way and just the other day she made a racial slur against whites. Terrific.

8. Kim Jong-Il launched another nuclear missile the other day. That makes six, according to John Bolton, the only person who is counting. What else is new?

9. The nice British lady singer had a breakdown. The nice British prince headed Memorial day at the Twin Towers. The nice British economy is collapsing. Yay Britain!

All of this is getting depressing. According to my prediction there will be a war about something. I don't know what yet. It could be national debt, abortion, whatever. I only know that this nation is tearing itself apart and it will soon be torn apart. There's only one thing that can truly symbolize the entirety of my depression: A sad emoticon. :(

Have a couple more for the road. :( :( :( :( :(

Early Education

Yesterday Heather was cleaning out the refridgerator while Andrew and I, being helpful chivalrous brothers, watched her. Suddenly Emily frisked by and shouted "Obama is stupid!" Andrew looked at me. He figured that whatever was happening was my fault because it had to do with politics. Heather just looked extremely shocked.

"Emily!" She yelped. "What did you say?"

"Obama is stupid," Emily said, "Because he gets rid of babies!" Then she frisked off as if nothing had happened. As you can see, we begin educating our children extremely early. Dad, when the story was later related to him, suggested that since Emily was herself a baby the issue was rather close to her heart. Personally, I think it has something to do with the fact that Emily has participated in the Walk for Life every year for her entire life. It's one thing to sit your kids down and explain justice to them, but it drives the message home much stronger to make your children go out and fight for it.

Flamingo, oh yeah!

Today was the Walk for Life, which I skipped in favor of fencing. Anyways, my siblings loved me so much that they put my name in for the raffle. I won a prize. It's a flamingo sculpture from Go Fish. It's awesome. If I knew how to operate a camera I would take a picture of me holding it and put it here.

The dilemma is figuring out where to put it. If you put it anywhere upstairs it will probably be knocked down and destroyed within a week. If you put it downstairs, mom will purse her lips every time she sees it and it will disappear mysteriously within a week. Either way its life expectancy isn't too good.

Anyways, I'd like to keep it because it reminds me of the Walk for Life, the same reason that I keep all my Walk for Life T-shirts and water bottles. It's awesome because the Walk for Life is something I believe is really important and so everything it produces is, by extension, awesome. It's not the sculpture I like half as much as what it stands for. It's a nice sculpture, though. Thank you Africans.

Simple Subtraction

This'll have to be my last post today lest I pass the 500 blogs a week limit. (I bet you didn't even know they had that limit.)

Anyways, I've found a use for subtraction: Calculating what time you ought to start your movies in order to end at a reasonable hour. For example: If you need to be done by 10:00 and your movie is 2 hours long, you should start no later than 8:00. I mention this because I have recently discovered that none of my siblings can do this.

Example 1: Heather recently tried to organize a watching of "Ever After" with the kids down to Grace (Bedtime=8:00). "Ever After" is 1 hr, 40 mins. What time should we start by?
Heather's Answer: 7:00.

Example 2: Alexie, Duncan, Andrew, David (Earliest bedtime: 9:00) all intended to watch a movie rental that needed to be returned as soon as possible. It was 100 mins (1 hr, 40 mins.) What time do we start by.
Alexie's and Andrew's Answer: Ignore Duncan and David trying to get it started at 7:00 so that David will be able to watch the whole thing. Send e-mails for thirty extra minutes, start at 7:30.

The reason I brought this up was because last night David helped with the Walk for Life. (fighting abortion.) David and Andrew had an one-hour movie for that night so I made sure to get David back before 8:00 so he could watch it. When we got back, we were immediately greeted by Andrew who said to David (exact quote): "David, because you went walking for life we can not watch our movie tonight." David was very upset. Now this strikes me as odd because Andrew: a) doesn't care whether anyone gets to bed on time. b) Always starts his movies way too late. c) Was wrong because they did manage to watch it all and end before 9:00.

The only thing that Andrew did by saying that was to make David feel bad for doing the Walk for Life, something which is one hundred times more important than watching a movie or doing computer projects.